My American adventure

This post is still being written and edited






I came online first time about 1998 and started out playing cribbage on yahoo, a game that I am truly a master of, I met a girl from Montreal, Canada and we played and chatted all the time, my friends thought I was mad to spend so much time online with a girl I had never met but I didn’t care. I felt I was falling in love with this girl and nobody was going to tell me any different....She spoke French as her main language and we talked sometimes on the phone but was much easier to talk online as her typing English was much better....

Well after 6 months of this, we arranged to meet in London, which is 200 miles from me and we arranged to meet at Waterloo train station at the clock tower at midday. Back then it was almost unheard of for people to meet others from the internet. Upon hearing this my mum said "omg, wow, there is a film where a couple meet there, a really romantic film and he took flowers, you must do the same" hmm lol
I am not that sort of romantic person, yes I open doors for girls etc, but I am more of a silly person so I guessed I would do something to reflect how silly I am.

Well my dad has this big fluffy Russian hat thing, you know the ones you see in films, so I thought I will put this on and when I meet her I will do that silly Russian dance thing, there they crouch down and kick their legs up (this is much harder to do than I first imagined!!!!)
So I met her at midday, she was with her sister and I did exactly that, as I walked past her I said “The bears in Montreal swim close to the harbour", I guess it was like a Russian spy codeword I was trying to make, well I was greeted with a huh? lol
oh well so much for that eh?
Well we spent 2 days together with her sister and I showed her the sights of London and we had a great time.

She went back to Canada and for 6 months this continued, we talked every night and played cards, in the end she said ok I will come live with you, let’s see what happens, wow, I was over the moon!!!!
I will cut this part short, but suffice to say the language barrier was very difficult and in the end she went to live in Paris with another guy she had also met whilst she came the first time and not to be bitter about this I am very happy for her, she is married with a child. We are still friends to this day.

After this I just got on with my life, even though it hurt, but if something isn’t meant to be its not meant to be, at least we tried...I met other people in real life and also online, but I will concentrate on the people online seeing as this is where my story is taking me.
I would also like to add that I am a good looking man, so I never have problems meeting girls and wasn’t really out there looking to meet Miss right, just I spend a lot of time online and meet nice people, so I have an open mind about meeting people online...the girls I met in England, well all the nice ones seemed to be already involved or married and the others, well they were just out for a bit of fun " it’s easy to meet a girl for fun, but not one who is committed" quote from myself...

Anyway over the next few months I met a few girls from online in my own country (England) one,. I went to meet a few times in a city called Preston, she had a son and was really nice, we kissed and stuff, but we both felt it was only a friendship and neither of us wanted to take it any further, the two others I met was purely for fun, yes that sounds wrong, but I think sometimes you need that in your life, as long as you are careful....


Ok, so one day I am sat there in a chat-room on the microphone just talking about life in general and a girl PMs me saying I love what you are talking about and hearing you talk, may I call you on the phone, so I said ok, she called me and we talked she was called Lori and she was from New York, she was about 3 years older than me, I was 29 at the time..
After 30 minutes she was saying wow I want you to come see me in New York, I said well I can’t afford that I only work in a bar, to which she replied it’s ok I will buy you a ticket!!! Well we talked non-stop for about 6 hours after this and in the end I began to like the girl, not because she was offering to buy my ticket but because I truly began to understand what she was all about and her loves, hates etc. I had been to USA once before with my parents and my sister who is 2 years younger than me, we went to Florida and had a great time so this was exciting to me to go back as I loved America and after talking for so long I was beginning to like this girl as she was open and honest with me......
I spoke to my parents about this and they said don’t go, she seems crazy to offer you a ticket within hours of meeting you and my sister said omg don’t go they have guns in USA and you never know what this girl is all about, but having thought about it, this is a girl, not a guy, I have never been afraid of a girl in my life why be worried...well a week later the ticket arrives in the mail, $550 return from Manchester to New York on British Airways, valid for the period of one year.......what am i to do? Turn this offer of a lifetime away, to go to New York, even if it doesn’t work out what bad can come from it, surely a girl isn’t going to pay for a ticket for me if she means any harm....I had to go, no doubt in my mind I had talked to this girl now for a while, I liked her what did I have to lose....I left my job my apartment everything else I had I left at my parents. Yes, don’t doubt me I was scared, I didn’t know what was going to happen but that was what was so exciting....

I flew to New York, nerves in my stomach not knowing what would happen, I got there and met her, she kissed me and hugged me, we got in a taxi and went back to her apartment in Valley Stream (on the edge of Queens) we got to her place and I had my suitcases in both hands, as I took one step inside her door, she said can we go to bed?????? Well I have been known to be forwards myself sometimes, but this was a complete shock, I was like errrrrrrrrrr can I unpack first?? She said well its been a while and I been looking forwards to this for so long,
 An hour later, she was saying we have to get married this week,. woooah I thought, hold on just a minute I just got here!!! She tried to explain that all the guys in her life so far had beaten her or tried to take her money, seeing as she was quite well off. I said well I am not like that I never ever hit a girl in my life and money is not important to me at all, I want friends and I would like to find love but love takes time it can’t be forced upon someone or bought....
So I spent a week with her and I met her sister one day, she was saying to me why are you with Lori she is crazy!!! Well her sister is very cute and I thought perhaps she was saying this because she wanted to be with me, so I didn’t know how to take that.

Well, later in that week, I still find this very silly, I had just used the bathroom and was drying my hands on the towel on the towel rail in the bathroom, when Lori came in shouting and screaming at the top of her voice, “What are you doing, that’s a show towel!!! its there for show not for use, it’s an Italian thing!!!!!! errrr WTF??????
I said hmm do you have a pint of milk in the fridge that’s just for show or an apple in the fruit bowl that’s not to be eaten??????
She didn’t like this and was going berserk!!!!
Ok, another week goes by and then one day she is crying and is inconsolable, I can’t talk to her or find out what is wrong and the phone rings, she doesn’t answer it.....so I pick it up and the following is the conversation., it’s her father...
Me; Hello 
dad: HI boy, you from England aren’t you???
Me: yes
Dad: well boy, you know my daughter had another guy from England over, he was from Liverpool
Me: yes she told me about him
Dad: well do you know that when she was 18 she had a car accident and has to take pills just to remain normal?
Me: yes sir, she has told me about that (I had also seen how many pills in the cupboard)
dad: well that last guy, he left after 3 weeks, the doctors say the brain damage that she received in the car wreck(crash for those of us in UK) was incurable
Me: yes I have talked to her a lot and I know all this
Dad: well the doctors say its incurable, perhaps it’s better that you go home
Me: Sir, I care for her, perhaps after all the guys she has told me about that wanted to beat her and steal from her, perhaps meeting a nice guy might be good for her
Dad: well that’s highly commendable of you "boy" and you sound nice but I think its wiser that you go home, we live 2000 miles away , because we can’t cope with our own daughter, even though she is 32 years old!!!
Me:(by now thinking omg what am I doing here) Well sir I am not just going to abandon her, she needs people who care for her, perhaps it will h help(but also thinking omg help get me out of here!!!)
Dad: well if you can do what nobody else has done then I commend you, but I recommend you leave when you can....
 Omg what do I do????? I am in New York now with a girl who her own father says is crazy..........

Well having that in my mind, I was a little scared as to why her parents would have to move away, but I had only been there just over 2 weeks and was only twice I had felt something was wrong, but despite this I still feel for this girl and what she had been through and was hoping, oh to be honest I don’t know what I was thinking right now, I was caught between feeling sorry for her and also thinking I can help, do I love her? I don’t know its too soon, I just like her to be happy after mall that’s happened, there must be something...confused help what I do, I’m in America on my own but with someone I don’t know......be strong Paul, its ok just see what happens......etc....oooh what do I do????
So things were ok for the next few days, although I felt a little uncomfortable, I’m not sure if that showed or not, but one day she was cooking in the kitchen (it was a all in one apartment, not including the bedroom) she was cutting something with a big knife and as I passed from the bathroom she waved this knife at me and (I will never ever forget her eyes at this moment, which is what truly scared me, they made my entire body feel rigid with fear, something I never thought I feel from anyone in my life, never mind a girl) she said, with eyes omg how do I explain, eyes as cold as ice as hard as steel as deep and dark as the deepest of abysses, something I have never felt before, I can’t say I felt evil but for that one moment I was truly scared, even so much so that it hurts me to type this now I shiver....I can’t even type the right keys,...

She said....."Why won’t you love me, why won’t you marry me? I hate the world, I hate everybody", she shouted it whilst waving the knife at me......

Well what are you supposed to do in such a situation when faced with a girl with a knife in your face in a strange city in a strange country, fight??? Omg no I never hit a girl in my life and what would happen if I did??? I was in America, who is to say the police are outside and I get shot as I am leaving after defending myself by fighting my way out, oh no, I can’t do that, I stepped back still looking at her eyes in shock waiting for her next move, I really never been in this situation before, yes I was scared but had to keep my cool and see what happened...

I don’t know about that, I think I was too shocked to be scared,, but I knew from that moment I had to get out of there, she looked at me, well stared with a look I have never seen before, like of hatred,  I had never been anything but nice to this girl, yet she glared at me with such a fierce glaze as if I was the devil himself, yet it felt the same way to me.....

I had only been there 2 weeks, how could I want to marry someone in that time, I just wanted to get to know her and if it was meant to be then I would feel it, I can’t say I love someone and want to spend the rest of my life with them in such a short time, yes people dream of that, but usually it doesn’t happen, this girl had other ideas on that it seemed....anyway....

So after this she put the knife down, said I am sorry I love you, but that was it, anything I could have ever felt for this girl, any feeling I could ever love her or even remain a friend, went just as if that knife had been stabbed through my heart and soul. I don’t think I could ever look at this girl in the eyes again, I had to get out, but what do I do??? Its about 9pm in the evening and I have nowhere else to go.....
 I stayed up and tried to act like nothing had happened and when she went to bed, I said I will be in shortly and stayed to watch TV, I waited and I waited , thinking do I wait till morning, but after this I knew I couldn’t sleep. after I don’t know how many hours I went in the bedroom and saw her fast asleep......now was my chance......
As quietly as I possibly could I packed all my clothes into my suitcase, grabbed everything that I knew where it was and quietly crept out of the door to the apartment even stopping to make sure I closed it as quietly as I could, I didn’t want any more scenes like that, I just wanted to escape....

Well there was a bar a bit further down the road....

I had been to this bar with this girl before and so a few of them said hi to me they must have realised something wasn’t right seeing as I had my suitcase with me and it was by now 2am..
They said they knew about the other guy and that he had problems too but they hadn’t said anything to me, because it was none of their business when they first met me to interfere, but one of them kindly offered to let me stay overnight and then get the bus to the airport in the morning....


So, the next morning I set off and whilst I am waiting in Queens, which was absolutely packed out with people, I was stood at the bus stop and overheard a man say "maybe I should meet a girl from the internet, perhaps I will meet a nice girl"  I had to say something I had to talk to this guy. I turned around and looked him square in the eyes and I said "excuse me, may I please say something to you!!!"

Well we got talking and I explained everything that had gone on, having talked to him for maybe 30-40mins, he asked me why I don’t stay longer in New York, I explained I was short on money, I had nowhere to stay I just wanted to go home, but he insisted saying "You are a guest in my country my friend, it’s not right that you have such bad memories on this city or this country, I own a few apartments in New York, you are very welcome to spend a couple of weeks with me, I will find you some work if you like, but no longer, as I don’t need a roommate I just want you to enjoy your stay here"
 Wow, well I am a good judge of character (aside from not knowing about the crazy girl) and I realised this guys intentions were all good, he was about 40 years old, good looking bloke, who I knew wasn’t gay, so his intentions weren’t that way towards me as ever cutey girl that walked past he would say" Baby, you are loooooooooooooking gooooooood" lol

So, it turned out he lived in Brooklyn and owned quite a few apartments there that he rent out and everyone he knew seemed to love this guy to bits.....






So I stay with this guy for 2 weeks, he has a bunk bed thing in his room and I stay on that whilst he has a main bed in there. This guy was so cool, always new people to socialise with and have a doobie (joint) or 6 with.
He had a couple of mountain bikes and he gave me one to use during my stay, he explained that its the only way to get around New York... and having seen how busy this city is, he isn’t far wrong.....

OK well from where he lived in Brooklyn, you could stand on what the Americans call a "deck", but what we would probably call errr, hmm what would we call it, perhaps a flat roof bit outside the patio doors, so I guess deck is easier to say lol
Anyway from this deck you could see Manhattan, which for those of you who don’t know is the island, with all the skyscrapers etc(New York is just mainly a bunch of islands in case you didn’t know except the mainland of course)

So one day we go out on our mountain bikes and we go downhill towards Manhattan, what a view!!! We got to the Brooklyn Bridge, where the cars go the bit below you and the top part you can walk or ride or even roller-skate across the water. You could see the empire state building in the distance, which I thought was the biggest thing there, until I saw the world trade centre’s (when of course they were still there) These 2 buildings were giant, all white with blacked out windows, (I gazed up at these wondering if anyone was watching me crossing the bridge)
Anyway as we got to the other side , he stopped me and said, “Ok, now you are on a bike, you control these roads, go on the left or the right, the sidewalk(pavement) or whatever you choose, those cars aren’t going to deliberately hit you, just remember you are in control” I will never forget this, as it is so true if you believe in yourself.
 It was an amazing feeling weaving through traffic people beeping horns at me; dodging past people on the sidewalk totally owning the roads hehe



After about 3 weeks of staying with this guy and really having fun in New York and meeting lots of cool people, he said he had to travel on business and asked if I would like to go anywhere, he would buy a ticket. Well I had a ticket home to England and I thought why not make the most of this trip, if this guy was nice enough to offer, then I would be a fool not to at least meet some other people I knew from online. He said to me its ok, no matter where you want to go, I will get you a ticket and I didn’t want to be cheeky and say the Bahamas, but I did have friends online who I had kept in touch with on his computer to let them know what was happening, so my choice was to go stay with a family I knew in Kentucky.

In a way it was scary, but I had to take this opportunity, so he offered me a flight, i said no, I would like to go on a greyhound bus and see some of the states and sights along the way, it is much better if I can say in the future than I have been to these states and places, rather than just fly over them.
 So I did, I took the bus, which took 24 hours, well several buses, going upstate New York first, full of trees, wow so many trees, it was like an endless forest, then through Pennsylvania, thought Illinois then south through Indiana, oh did I forget Ohio, then Tennessee, and finally Kentucky, did I miss any states there?

 Well I arrive in Paducah Kentucky and meet the woman who I knew most of all the family, she was about 42, also in the house was an old man who I think owned the place, two 17 year old daughters, one 14 year old and one baby.
Well the first evening It was getting dark and I went outside, there was an amazing noise out there of grasshoppers, frogs or whatever else lives at night, which is really unusual to someone from England.
If you went out to the country at night, the only noises you might hear are perhaps of a sheep or cars going by, no insects and things, just complete silence apart from that. It was cool, a bit like natures music.
 Well then I started to see flashes in front of my eyes, I thought someone had spiked my drink I asked if they were fireflies, they said no they are called lightning bugs. I was 29 years old and I was like a little kid, I got a jam jar (Americans call jam jelly, whereas jelly to us is the wobbly stuff that Americans call jello) and went round catching these flies, I made sure I had lots of holes in the top so they wouldn’t die and make myself a sort of lantern thing, but they stopped flashing within an hour
Well after this I asked where the nearest bar was, as I had just travelled 24 hours on a bus and really needed a beer and a game of pool or something only to be told the nearest bar was 40 miles away!
They explained it was a dry county, something I had never heard of, it meant that because of some religious rule or something the entire county was not allowed to sell alcohol, wow! Crazy!

I am sure this encourages drink driving if you have to travel 40 miles for a beer or it’s a very long walk home or a very expensive taxi fare.
They said you could go to a supermarket or off license (liquor store) out of the county and bring beers back to your house.
It was odd, because when I went in a supermarket nearby, it was giant, it sold everything including the kitchen sink, you could actually go in there and buy a gun, load it up, go out in the car park and shoot someone, but you couldn’t buy a beer, hmm what’s more dangerous I thought!

Being used to a social life in England comprising mostly of going out to a pub or club to socialise and meet people, I asked how they do that there, they said you go to church. I just couldn’t see myself going to church to meet a cute chick to take home at the end of the sermon or to play pool and have a drinking competition with the priest and talk about BS for hours, so to me I was getting a bit bored. I needed adventure.

So after about 3 weeks there I decided to go meet a girl the other side of Kentucky, it was about 400 miles away, but I figured since I have hitchhiked all over Europe I could make easily if I set off early in the morning.
So I did. I packed a small bag with some sandwiches and one of the girls drove me to the interstate junction. I said I would be back in a couple of days and kissed them all, except the old man of course, he just had a handshake.
I met some really cool people along the way, as I always seem to when hitchhiking, including one guy who said he had a band, well we stopped at his house, wow!!!! it was a mansion!!! He had a maid there looking after his child and everything. We went downstairs to a massive basement that was filled with Hydroponic machines, with pot plants growing in them, they were for himself. He had a full band set out down there with drums etc. I wish I had kept the card he gave me with the name of the band on it and his number, as even though I had never heard of them, seeing his house he must have been someone famous and I can’t for the life of me remember his name or the band name, perhaps due to the very strong pot we smoked before munching on some food and him dropping me off further down the road...

I got there well before dark and it turned out the town I was in, in the mountains of east Kentucky, along the blue grass highway was the original hometown of a famous country and western singer called Loretta Lynne, well I have never heard of her but then again I don’t follow country music much.



I spent 2 days with this girl and her family, but one night I stayed over at one of her friend’s houses with this guy and girl who were about 25 years old. We spent the night getting drunk on vodka and smoking weed.

During the course of the evening the Guy kept telling me he was the Devil and telling me if I wanted to stay in America, he could arrange an American passport for me, but I would be indebted to him for 3 years. I asked what he meant by that and he explained that I would have to do anything he asked me to for 3 years. I never felt afraid of him, but he kept insisting he was the Devil and I just said, I am just a traveler and wish no harm on people, just to have a good time along my way. (2 weeks after i left here I was told by this girl that he had run over some guy in his own car and was locked in jail for murder
Anyway I left 2 days later and after a few rides I met a guy called Donnie, who after talking to for a while said that if I wasn’t in any hurry to get where I wanted to go, he would love me to meet his wife, since she would be amazed by my story so far and always wanted to meet someone from England. They lived just north of Kentucky in a state called Indiana.


Well they lived in a cornfield in a lovely little cottage with a swimming pool. When we got there, he said "here these shorts should fit you put them on and jump in the pool" Well it was a really hot day, so I chilled out in the pool and he brought me a bottle of Budweiser and said "here is a bud, and here is another bud and offered me a nice big fat joint" .
His wife was lovely and they had a daughter too, I think about 14 or 15. We spent many hours chatting that evening and when they went to bed they said there was a computer and I should use it to keep up with everyone on the internet and sleep when I was ready, which I did.

It was great to keep everyone updated with what was happening and by now I had quite an interest going in the chat room on what was happening with me or what would happen next. I didn’t even know myself; I was just going with the flow of life and letting it take me. it felt so good just to let things happen, be spontaneous and not be tied down by anything in life. The way I looked at it, if I was trying to get from one place to another and stealing from people to get there, then bad things would probably happen to me, but if I am just heading for somewhere and trying to have some fun along the way and meet new people, then good things will happen. This is basically how I life my life, like Karma I guess.